Hello Everyone,
Happy Friday! I cannot believe that it’s already August. Where has the time gone this summer. Today I will be doing one last sneak peek chapter from my memoir Finding My True Happiness: Life, Love & Everything In Between. For the last chapter that I have decided to share with all of you is called Finding My Independence. For those of you that have already gone out and purchased my book thank you so much. Please remember to rate and review my book. Reviews are very important for authors because the more reviews we get the people will want to read and purchase the book.
These are the places that I know of so far that are selling my book online. Amazon, Abe Books, Barns & Noble, Book Shop, Books A Million, Better World Books, Biblio, Powells Books. If I find out other places where you can buy it, I will let you all know.
Finding My Independence
I have always been that person who wants to have my freedom and independence. Even being a person who has an intellectual disability that has never stopped me from trying. Ever since I was a child, I never liked it, when someone would tell me I could not do something or that I would never do something because of my disability. That had always made me want things even more, no matter how long it would take me to do whatever I was doing. I can also be very stubborn when people say that I am unable to do something, but it just gives me more motivation to prove those people wrong.
It also makes me more driven to do these things. Growing up, having two brothers that were capable of so many things that were sometimes more challenging for me was difficult. One thing that was hard for me to accept was that fact that I would not learn how to drive like my two brothers. It was a hard pill to swallow, but overall, I have realized that it’s a good thing.
Also, I would have to say that seeing people driving on the roads here in the lower mainland in British Columbia makes me a little nervous. Everyone drives so fast, and everyone always is in a hurry to go anywhere. If I was living in a much smaller community, I think I would feel a more comfortable to have my driver’s license. I have gained more independence by taking the public transit to anywhere that I need to go, and I also get to take the HandyDart buses.
Do not get me wrong, there have been plenty of times where I have missed the public buses by a few minutes and there is nothing worse than having to sit on the bench at the bus stop to wait for the next bus. There have been some good things that I have learned over the years from my parents, who have always given me my independence. Although it did not start out that way. I had to learn and earn my independence gradually. As I got older, I would get a little more independence by showing my parents that I am capable of more responsibility. One of the first things that I learned was how to make my bed and clean my room.
Growing up, having two dogs had taught me how to be a responsible pet owner. Having the dogs also showed me to be more compassionate towards them and people. I could walk home from school all by myself once I hit grade four, and I could have my house key, so that if I were the first one home from school, I could unlock the door. Then, as I had gotten more into my teen years, I had learned to do more life skills like doing a little bit of cooking, baking, laundry etc.
These things might not be important for most people but for myself, my parents have told me that there were some doctors that had told them that I would not be able to talk or be able to do any of these things that I just listed. It goes to show you that being stubborn is not always a bad thing. I know that there are things that I am not able to do on my own but that is when I am not afraid to ask for help. I have learned the hard way by trying to do everything on my own. Even when my family has always been there to offer me help. I used to think that asking for help was a bad thing because to me that meant that I could not do things on my own.
I had thought that way for a long time because of my disability but that was never the case at all. Now as I have gotten older, I do try do things on my own first and then if I am not able to do something I will ask for help from my family. Most of the times I can usually figure things out on my own. There have been two important things that I know that have surprised my family and myself.
The first one is getting married to the love of my life and living completely on my own. I can say that being able to be married and living with the person that makes me happy has not only been a huge accomplishment for me and my husband. It has also been a huge accomplishment for his family and my family as well. Living with my husband Matt has been great for both of us. We have been able to do a lot for ourselves. For example, we have both been able to find our current jobs without using any special services that are offered for us being persons with intellectual disabilities.
We have used the services before to give us both help with prior jobs. They help you prepare for interviews, resumes and job training which was helpful with our previous jobs. I am grateful that we have these kinds of services around for us because they are great to have so that they can set us up for success right from the beginning. Now we both have great jobs that we are both doing great at which is huge for us. There is not a lot of places that we have been at that will take the time to train us properly and understand that we both have intellectual disabilities.
~Crystal~
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